Despite how much purists love to hide this fact, nice guys lose all the time. This is not to say that you should become a wicked, heartless modern day Hitler. There is a certain aura of manliness you need to have in order to be respected and adored by the opposite S3@.x:’ and everyone else.
Much of the difference between a nice guy and a real man comes down to confidence and how that confidence expresses itself in both physical and psychological terms. There is something very attractive about someone who is self-assured enough to be unconcerned with trivialities and has that air of indifferent positivity about them.
Nice guys often internalize emotions and feelings, so that others don’t have to suffer them, but these feelings often find other ways of revealing themselves unattractively. Often, they will occur as slightly feminine traits or even in a manner that is damaging to themselves and the perception that others have of them.
Real men, on the other hand, are in control of their feelings and allow them to be externalized in a healthy and measured way. Working on this balance between confidence and externalization is the key to becoming the real man of every woman’s dreams.
So how can you transform from nice to real?
1. Always take charge.
One of the biggest things that nice guys get wrong is in choosing to let the lady make all the decisions. He believes that he’s being gentlemanly and courteous by letting her take the lead, but in actual fact, it just looks weak and indecisive. So, take charge chaps! Unless she really wants to.
2. Be a great listener and problem solver.
Taking a genuine interest in what the lady is saying is so important. It lets her feel important, and it gives you time to think about what you’re going to say or do next. Most importantly, it shows that you’re confident enough to take on board what others have to say. Of course, don’t be afraid to speak your mind either, which is another sign that you are confident and manly.
3. Know when to say sorry and when not to.
Nice guys say sorry all the time. They say sorry for sitting too close or too far away. They say sorry when they go to the rest-room. They say sorry when they sit down again. They seem to say sorry for the inconvenience of blighting the universe with their existence which, needless to say, doesn’t look very manly or confident. However, the one thing he doesn’t do is say sorry when it matters, preferring instead to sulk or moan about the situation. A real man knows and admits when he is wrong or has made a mistake, and will openly and unreservedly apologize for it. But that is the only time you will hear the word pass his lips.
Image: quick meme
4. Speak out when you don’t agree with what is on the table.
A real man doesn’t feel the need to agree with everyone to keep them sweet. The nice guy wants everything to passively swim along, but by bottling up his opinions, he is in danger of letting them loose in a tirade somewhere down the line. A real man doesn’t worry about disagreeing with others. But when he does, he forms an argument in a measured and constructive way, never making a fuss or losing his temper.
5. Be a rock.
A real man is emotionally stable at all times, quite a different thing from being emotional, which is the hallmark of a nice guy. Nice guys gush and cry and sulk and seek approval. Real men do not. They don’t let the behavior or attitude of other people rattle them in the slightest, and they take it all on the chin.
Image: Muscle and fitness
6. Sit/stand-up straight or in a confident position and keep strong eye contact.
Constantly averting your gaze and turning your body to the side so that you aren’t properly facing the object of your desires stinks of a lack of confidence, and is a real turn off.
Images by Instagram/ The September standard
7. Be confident about which greeting you choose to adopt, whether kiss on the cheek, handshake or whatever else.
Decide what you’re going to do and execute it with aplomb. There’s nothing worse that someone who changes their mind halfway through a course of action, and it could lead to dangerously crossed wires!
8. Be aware of the way you deliver when talking.
Similar to the previous point, take your time, think about your response first, then speak in a clear, loud and measured fashion. Squeaking, whispering, mumbling and hurried speech are perceived as very unmanly.
9. Don’t appear afraid when danger arises, even if you are.
A real man is B.rave. He doesn’t show any acts of cowardice. Being afraid makes you look weak. If there is danger somewhere, always be ready to jump in and neutralize the situation. Don’t hide behind your woman.